The Journey to Having Nathan John

Nathan, just a short while after he was born.

For my whole life, I have wanted to be a mom. It was just always something I knew I wanted. I married my husband, Ryan, in September of 2013. We enjoy spending time with each other, and this year will celebrate 14 years together as a couple. Being married is wonderful, and we wanted to add to that happiness by having a child.  After we celebrated our fourth wedding anniversary, we decided the time was right to start our family. The very next month, in October of 2017 we started trying.

I was very lucky to get pregnant on the first try and it was hard to imagine that there was life growing inside me. I found out I was pregnant right before Halloween of 2017.

We went to my Obstetrician’s office and got to hear our baby’s heartbeat and see him on the ultrasound. It was so cool to hear his tiny little heartbeat for the first time. The OB told me that my due date was early July 2018.

From our pregnancy announcement photo shoot in December 2017

I didn’t do any genetic testing before I became pregnant.  My husband and I decided it was better not to know. It would just cause unnecessary worry and it wouldn’t change anything about our decision to have a baby. We did do one prenatal screening called the Harmony test. It tests for Down Syndrome and a few other genetic anomalies, through a blood test when a woman is 10-weeks pregnant. It can also tell the gender of the baby, which is pretty accurate. Over the winter holidays, we got the results back from the Harmony test I took.

Everything was normal and we were having a BOY! I will always remember the moment we found out our baby was a boy. We were standing in the kitchen, listening to a voicemail from the nurse from my OB’s office with the test results. As soon as we found out, we were jumping up and down hugging and crying. They were happy tears.

Many people refer to baby boys as “little man.” I don’t particularly care for this expression, so when talking to my son in my belly I decided to call him “Little Boy.” This would go on to be his nickname because his name was a surprise to everyone. At my baby shower, my mom made a banner that said “Little Boy” and it is now hanging in his nursery. My husband and I thought of his name months before he was even conceived on the way back from a road trip. We decided to keep his name to ourselves. The only hint we gave anyone was that he was named after a family member who had passed.

Me at about 30-weeks pregnant. Early May, 2018

I experienced some complications with my pregnancy including nausea the entire time, bad swelling, prenatal hypertension and later preeclampsia.  According to the Mayo Clinic, “Preeclampsia is a pregnancy complication characterized by high blood pressure and signs of damage to another organ system, most often the liver and kidneys. Preeclampsia usually begins after 20 weeks of pregnancy in women whose blood pressure had been normal.”

During one of my OB appointments, my doctor sent me to the hospital because of my high blood pressure at 34-weeks pregnant. That was the first time I had seen this doctor, since my OB practice has many doctors and whoever is on call that day is the doctor that delivers your baby. I stayed overnight at Northside Hospital-Atlanta. At that time, it was estimated I would deliver at 36 or 37-weeks pregnant due to all the complications I was experiencing.

At 35-weeks pregnant, during my OB appointment, the doctor sent me back to the hospital due to a very high blood pressure and a headache that wouldn’t go away. This is a common sign of preeclampsia and was very worrisome to my doctor. While I was resting before going to the appointment, my husband had a feeling we were having the baby. He gathered up and packed our bags for the hospital.

We arrived at Northside and were taken to a room in C-section waiting since the baby was still breech. I asked my husband what the date was. He said, “June Fourth.” I decided that was a good day to have a baby. We still didn’t know what was going on and when I would deliver our son. We filled out paperwork and I saw the on-call doctor, who happened to the same one who sent me to the hospital earlier. He said that it would be best to do the C-section that night. By that time it was about 5 o’clock in the evening. The operating room was booked for 8:30 p.m. based on my last meal. We literally found out three hours before our son was born that we were for sure having him that day. It was suspected that I had preeclampsia and the doctor wanted to deliver him then because that condition has a tendency to escalate very quickly. It can be very harmful to the mother and the baby.

I was prepped for surgery and taken to the OR, where I had my C-section.  Only one support person is allowed in the OR, so my husband went with me.

The procedure went well, with no complications. Since I was only 35-weeks, there was a team from the NICU in the operating room just in case. They turned out not to be needed. The nurses wiped down our son and he was placed on my chest. I will always remember this special moment. In fact, it is making me teary-eyed as I write this. I said to my son, “Hi Nathan, I’m your Mommy.” It felt so good to see my son. The first thing I noticed was how little and cute he was. He was staring right at me and was very calm, all bundled up in his swaddle blanket. All this time, my husband was snapping pictures with his phone of our son and the anesthesiologist took the classic C-Section family photo with the sheet in the background and us in our surgical gear.

First Family Photo

My husband left the room and followed the nurses with Nathan to weigh him in the nursery. I was then sent to recovery. My husband remembers one of the nurses saying, “I don’t think he’s going to make weight, he’s really light.” The NICU nurses said, “What are you talking about? He looks big.” She then said, “You’re used to all the really little babies.” Turns out he didn’t make weight and had to go to the transition nursery to be evaluated. Nathan John Basler was born at 9:22 p.m. on June 4,2018, weighing 4 lbs. 6 oz. and 17 inches long. He was five weeks early and considered premature. Aside from some temperature issues and a little jaundice, Nathan was perfectly healthy and was then brought into our hospital room shortly after I came back from recovery.

During our five-day stay in the hospital for Nathan’s birth, he was not eating as much as he should. The doctors at Kennesaw Pediatrics, our pediatrician practice, saw Nathan every single day he was in the nursery. Our pediatrician recommended that Nathan see a feeding therapist and hoped that he wouldn’t have to go to the NICU for poor feeding.

We saw the feeding therapist in our hospital room and she gave us some good pointers on helping him eat better. Premature babies aren’t always the best at feeding since that is one of the last skills babies develop in the womb. I had Nathan on a Monday, and Friday evening he was admitted to the NICU for poor feeding. We were thankful we had those full four days with our son in our hospital room and that he was a healthy baby boy, just needed to learn how to eat properly.

Nathan, One day old

Having a child in the NICU is very hard, especially when you have to go home but your baby does not. It was a very trying time for our family. I cried at some point every single day. I just wanted our baby home. We visited him every day.  My husband would wake up at 4 a.m. to go before work and I would go in the afternoon and stay until long after my husband got off work and came back to the NICU to be with Nathan. Everyone at the Northside Hospital NICU was wonderful. The doctors, nurses and staff were all great to work with and very caring towards our son. Northside is a tier three NICU, so it is one of the best there is. If our son couldn’t come home with us, we were glad he was being taken care of at Northside versus another hospital. 

Nathan in the NICU

We were released from the NICU after 13 long days. We found out that we were going home about three hours before we did. We knew it was a possibility but didn’t think it would happen right then. Sound familiar?

We finally got to take our little boy home! The first night was exhausting. The next day, we called my parents to come over and help a little because we were so sleep deprived. Feeding him every three hours will wear you out! My husband stayed home from work for a week after he came home to be there and help care for our son.

Leaving the hospital with our boy!

Time went on and we got used to having him home. We took newborn photos the first week he was home, at three weeks old. On Thursday, June 28 our son had his brit milah or bris.  A bris is a Jewish tradition dating back thousands of years where a baby boy is circumcised and receives his Hebrew name. Before I talk about Nathan’s Hebrew name, I’ll talk about his English name. He is named after Nathan Zlotnik, my dad’s father, who is a Holocaust survivor, and passed away at the age of 90 when I was 10 years old. His middle name, John, is named after my husband’s Great Uncle Johnny. He was like a second grandfather to my husband, especially after his own grandfather passed. They would spend his childhood summers at Uncle Johnny’s lake house in Tennessee on the water. I got to know Uncle Johnny over the years and had the pleasure of visiting the lake house too. About three years ago, Uncle Johnny passed away at the age of 90. We decided to name our son after these family members who meant so much to us, but also had other family members we wanted to honor that also were dear to our hearts.

From Nathan’s newborn photo session.

This is where Nathan’s Hebrew name comes from. He was named Nissim Allon. Nissim is after my grandfather Nelson Zavack, who is my mom’s father. He passed away when I was about two years old, and I don’t really remember him. He meant a lot to our family. Nissim means miracle and our boy is such a little miracle.

He is also named Allon, after my husband’s grandfather on his mother’s side, Allen Morrell. He passed away before my husband was born. My in-laws named my husband after Allen Morrell and we decided to carry on that tradition. Allon means oak tree and they are strong with deep roots. We really think that describes our son perfectly. He is so strong for just a tiny little guy and has so many family members who love him.

The bris was a wonderful ceremony. It was very hard to watch my son be circumcised, but I got through it. The bris was very meaningful. I like to think that I am bringing Jewish tradition back to my family because I wanted to have the ceremony and plan to raise my son with Jewish teachings.

Nathan’s Bris

At his 2-month appointment, Nathan measured 9 pounds 11 ounces and his weight more than doubled since birth. He is eating well and thriving. I’m so grateful my son and I are healthy after the journey we had. I sure love being his mom.

Author’s Note: I wrote this story about my son back in August, 2018. Nathan is now 9-months-old and weighs 18 pounds! We’re planning his first birthday party for June and I can’t believe my baby is getting so big!

A Decade Down, Forever to Go

This year on November 11, my husband and I will celebrate 10 years as a couple. Although we have only been married for two years, we have been together forever and know each other very well. We have a decade down and forever to go. In this post, I will share memories and pictures of the past 10 years starting with the year we met, 2005.

2005

Our First Date

Our First Date

2005 Memories:

  • We met through Greek life at Kennesaw State.
  • Our first date was my sorority dance with friends and then we went camping afterwards.
  • We started dating and went out to parties and restaurants.
  • We went to his fraternity Christmas party and celebrated the holidays together.
  • We rung in the New Year together.

2006

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Our 9 Month Anniversary Date

2006 Memories:

  • We both celebrated our 21st birthdays.
  • We started officially dating on St. Patrick’s Day.
  • We went to Ryan’s great uncle’s lake house for the first time together over July 4th weekend.
  • We went to a lot of concerts together.
  • Ryan met my family from California during a visit for my brother’s college graduation.
  • We had our first time apart when I went to Israel.
  • In August, Ryan gave me his Greek letters to wear, a lavaliere. I had a candle pass ceremony with my sorority.
  • We had a very nice anniversary date to celebrate 9 months.

 

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Ryan’s Fraternity Formal

2007 Memories:

  • I landed an internship at the TowneLaker Magazine and Ryan landed his at Childspring International.
  • We went to my sorority formal together, the Purple Iris Ball in Atlanta.
  • We went to the lake house in Tennessee again. This time for a long weekend.
  • We also went to Ryan’s Roseball fraternity formal in October.

2008

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San Francisco and our California Coast Road Trip

2008 Memories

  • We both graduated college this year. I graduated in May, and Ryan graduated in December.
  • Upon graduation, I was hired for my first job out of college at the same magazine I interned at.
  • We attended our last fraternity and sorority formals. Ryan’s Roseball was in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina.
  • We went on our first big vacation together. We flew into LA, spent time with my family, and then drove up the coast to San Francisco and back.
  • We went to our friends’ weddings.

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April and Ryan Cruise 2

Bahamas Cruise

2009 Memories:

  • In January, we went on a cruise to the Bahamas.
  • In February, I unfortunately was laid off from the magazine due to the economy.
  • In March, I started working at Life University.
  • In April, we went to New York City for the first time for a long weekend.
  • I moved out of my parent’s house and into an apartment with roommates.
  • Ryan started prosthetics school at Northwestern University in Chicago and took online classes.

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My 25th Birthday

2010 Memories:

  • Ryan moved to Chicago for three months to finish up prosthetics school at Northwestern for the hands-on portion of his program.
  • We had a long distance relationship during that time and we got through it.
  • April started the Staff Newsletter at Life University.
  • Ryan graduated from Northwestern and started his prosthetics residency.
  • We celebrated our five year anniversary with dinner at Shout and stayed at the W hotel.
  • April got a second job writing freelance for Patch.com.

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Trip to Hilton Head

2011 Memories:

  • We got snowed in for a week at my apartment during the big storm.
  • We went to Hilton Head over July 4th weekend.
  • We moved in together in July to the Vinings area.
  • We went to a friend’s wedding at Villa Christina and loved it so much we ended up getting married there two years later.
  • We got our first Christmas tree for our apartment and decorated for Chanukkah and X-mas.

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Engagement Photo Shoot

Engagement Photo Shoot

2012 Memories:

  • We fostered a very cute kitty for a week. Wish we could have kept her!
  • We found a new hobby- archery! We shot bows and arrows at an archery learning center.
  • Ryan became a Certified and Licensed Prosthetist.
  • April started her personal blog here on WordPress.
  • We got engaged on September 12th! We started planning our wedding and set a date.
  • My parents found out they had to move to Texas the next year for my dad’s job.
  • We spent the Christmas holidays with my in-laws in Florida and went to the Florida Keys.

2013

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Our Wedding

2013 Memories:

  • We continued to plan our wedding and registered for gifts.
  • My brother and sister-in-law got engaged! We attended their engagement party in Baltimore, Maryland.
  • We had our engagement photo session.
  • My parents moved to Texas and we moved into their house here.
  • I had two bridal showers and a bachelorette party.
  • We got married! **September 29, 2013**
  • We went to Kauai, Hawaii for our honeymoon.
  • I totaled my Camry in an accident and then we bought a Volvo station wagon for me to drive.
  • Ryan got into photography and videography.

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At my brother’s wedding in Cancun

2014 Memories

  • My brother and sister-in-law got married in Cancun, Mexico. What a fun destination wedding!
  • We survived Snow Jam 2014. Ryan got stranded overnight in his car.
  • We attended and were in a lot of family and friends’ weddings.
  • We went to San Francisco for my cousin’s Bar Mitzvah and then went on our anniversary road trip to Vancouver and back. We stopped in Napa, the Redwoods, Portland and Seattle.
  • We celebrated our first wedding anniversary!
  • Ryan started his photography and videography business.
  • April was hired as a freelance writer for the Atlanta Jewish Times.

2015

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The Baslers do the Grand Canyon

2015 Memories:

  • We both turned the big 3-0 this year!
  • April wrote a cover story for the Atlanta Jewish Times.
  • Ryan published his website and his photography and videography business grew.
  • We went to Las Vegas in April for the first time. We also went on a Grand Canyon tour.
  • Ryan made a short film and entered it into a contest.
  • We bought a new car and swapped vehicles with family, so we’re both driving different cars now.
  • We celebrated our second wedding anniversary at a museum and had dinner where we got married.
  • We have travel plans to go to Texas soon and visit my parents. We are going to Florida for Thanksgiving with Ryan’s family.
  • And much more to come!

I’m looking forward to many more decades of happy memories with my husband, Ryan. Happy 10 years babe!

Cha Cha Cha Changes!

A while back, I wrote a piece I was very proud of for my blog. Then I read about a writing contest through “Narrative Magazine” where I could potentially win a lot of money and get my name out there. I was not able to post it on my blog until the decision was made on the winner. Unfortunately, I did not win, but now I get to share it with all of you! This is the story I wrote in early March:

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Merriam Webster dictionary defines change as: “to give a different position, course, or direction to.”

We all go through changes in our lives, sometimes they just happen more often than you think. Personally, my life is changing right in front of me and in a big way. These changes not only affect me, they affect my family and my soon-to-be family. Change can be hard, but sometimes it is for the best. You have to embrace change and deal with what you have. After all, you only have one life and you must live it fully in the best way possible with whatever hand you are dealt.

I am having a very exciting time in my life — I’m getting married. Marriage is a change that you can only know once you have experienced it. So who better to ask about marriage than my married friends? Marriage changes your outlook on life. Instead of thinking about just you and looking out for number one, you are now a “We.” What’s his is yours and what yours is his. Marriage teaches you to be less selfish. It allows you to feel more secure in your relationship because it is going to last forever (ideally). It opens the lines for communication and allows your partner to share more than they would before. This is because of the bond that is now formed because you become one.

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Planning a wedding is a full time job in itself. And I’m not even hiring a wedding planner! We do have a month-of coordinator, but I am mostly doing all the work myself.  Finding and contacting vendors, getting recommendations, etc. I get a lot of help and opinions from my mom and friends, but it is mainly all on me. Its work, but it sure is fun! Less than 7 months to go! But our planning has to be in full swing much quicker because of some other changes going on. Due to my dad’s job transfer, my parents have to move to Dallas, Texas a few months before the wedding. That kind of threw a wrench in our planning, but we are making it work.

One good thing that will come from my parents’ temporary move is that my fiancé and I will be moving into their house in Marietta! We will get a chance to save some money and put those savings toward a house of our own one day. That will be a big change for us too, especially since the move is for only a year and a half. Most of their stuff will stay in the house but we are bringing some furniture with us. It may be a bit weird at first, but I think this is a good situation and we are very grateful to be able to do it.

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My fiancé’s parents are also going through a similar change right now. His dad came out of retirement to move to Homestead, Florida and work at the nuclear power plant down there. He and my future mother-in-law moved into an apartment and had to undergo a lot of changes for the 9 months or so that he is working down there. The work requires him to work six 12-hour shifts. Seventy two hours a week, which is the maximum hours a person is legally allowed to work. It is taking a lot out of him and I know it is also hard on my fiancé and his mom. My fiancé and I have been checking on their house in Buford to make sure it is being kept up. Too bad they don’t have relatives living in their house like my parents will when they move.

If you didn’t think that was enough change- think again! My big brother recently got engaged! He and his fiancée (my future sister-in-law!) have been dating for almost three years and he finally popped the question. He proposed in the middle of the sidewalk after eating a nice dinner in their old neighborhood. I’m so happy to have her as a sister and excited that she is also one of my bridesmaids in my wedding! We are very excited for them and look forward to attending their wedding, which will probably be held early next year.

So, we are adding new family and merging families through marriage, and family is moving and dealing with different situations at the same time. But in the end, my family will be stronger and grow larger. Changes are hard at times but it is a fact of life. I’m looking forward to what these changes will bring in the years to come.